Explaining Bibek is a great tool for Gurmat Parchar
I agree with other members that its difficult to explain these things to family members. I remember before I took AMrit I tried to follow bibek to a certain level and when offered food from co-workers I would reject it and explain to them I had a strict religious diet. I didnt want to confuse them or make them feel inferior so I just told them I only eat food that has been blessed with the Gurus mantra. Then they became more interested in what is "Mantra" instead of my special diet. After I briefly explained them about the GUrmantra they were very understanding and could relate . They said " Oh its kind of like praying before you eat your food", and then I responsed " yes, but the mantra is recited when preparing the food as well, and the person who makes the food should be a person who makes the food should have a certain level of devotion to the mantra" They were not nosey people so they didnt ask me any more questions or test questions like others have done.
I think most people get offended because they feel inferior or feel like a sinner if you dont eat from them. They also tend to think GUrsikhs think they are better then them because they wont accept your food. SO I think its important to explain what Bibek is and explain to them it doesnt necessarily mean you will eat food from any SIkh. Once you explain to them I only eat food from Sikhs who practice the GUrus teachings then they will become more understanding and realize that so and so is not discriminating against me because of my religion or beliefs. When my relatives saw me not eating from my AmritDhari grandmother then they did begin to understand that I dont show any type of favoritism towards SIkhs and slowly begin to understand that Bibek is a diet based on Spiritual principles.
You can also explain to them the following Shabad
Gwil Kwie ikCu hQhu dyie ]
ghaal khaae kishh hathhahu dhaee ||
One who works for what he eats, and gives some of what he has
nwnk rwhu pCwxih syie ]1]
naanak raahu pashhaanehi saee ||1||
- O Nanak, he knows the Path. ||1||
and then explain to them that to make an honest living and give to others are some of the core pillars of the SIkh faith . Explain that food which is purchased and made from an honest and righteous living is the most blessed food. Then explain to them there is a rehatnama ( Bhai Daya SIngh Ji) which explains that the path of the warriors is to consume food from those who only bear weapons. Meaning we only eat from those people who have a righteous living.
If someone doesnt not bear a shaster then they are too timid and more concerned about their own lives then defending the lives of the innocent. You can also use some US Histroy to try to convey the message. FOr example tell them them when the tyrannical British Empire ruled AMerica it was only though the protest of the brave militia ( American Patriots) that many Americans gained full independence from the hands of Tyrants. By bearing weapons and unselfishly fighting the early Amerian patriots were able to provide people a dignified life. The salt ( food) of such people is most pleasing to God, while the salt that is consumed through the hands which does not do good for others is less pleasing to the Master/enjoyer. Then explain that only those people who wake early , meditate on Gods name, and make a righteous living is the only acceptable food according to the SIkh teachings.
This Shabad is by Bhai Gurdaas Ji in Vaars Bhai Gurdaas on Pannaa 30
lUxu swihb dw KwiekY rx AMdir liV mrY su jwpY]
loon saahib dhaa khaaeikai ran a(n)dhar larr marai s jaapai||
True is he who is True to the salt of his master and dies fighting for him in the battlefield.
isr vFY hQIAwru kir vrIAwmw virAwmu is\wpY]
sir vadtai hathheeaar kar vareeaamaa variaam sin(j)aapai||
One who beheads the enemy with his weapon is known as brave among the warriors.
iqsu ipCY jo iesqrI Qip QyeI dy vrY srwpY]
this pishhai jo eisatharee thhap thhaeee dhae varai saraapai||
His bereaved woman is established as sati capable of granting boons and curses.
poqY puq vfIrIAin prvwrY swDwru prwpY]
pothai puth vaddeereean paravaarai saadhhaar paraapai||
Sons and grandsons are praised and the whole family became exalted.
vKqY auPir liV mrY AMimRq vylY sbdu AlwpY]
vakhathai oufar larr marai a(n)mrith vaelai sabadh alaapai||
One who dies fighting in the hour of peril and recites the Word in the ambrosial hour is known as the True warrior.
swDsMgiq ivic jwie kY haumY mwir mrY Awpu AwpY]
saadhhasa(n)gath vich jaae kai houmai maar marai aap aapai||
Going to the Holy Congregation and effacing his desires, he wipes out his ego.
liV mrxw qY sqI hoxu gurmuiK pMQu pUrx prqwpY]
larr maranaa thai sathee hon guramukh pa(n)thh pooran parathaapai||
Dying while fighting in battle and maintaining of the control over the senses is the grand path of the Gurmukhs.
sic isdk sc Piru pCwpY ]14]
sach sidhak sach fari pashhaapai ||14||
In whom you repose your full faith is known as the True Guru.(14)
ਸਤਿਗੁਰਬਚਨਕਮਾਵਣੇਸਚਾਏਹੁਵੀਚਾਰੁ॥