I am writing this blog because there is this one thing which is really troubling my mind. It is affecting the quality of my life.
It was around the time, when I was in college. I use to hear a lot about giving 10% of what you earn for charity purposes. So, in my mind I decided to give 10% of what I will earn without giving it a much thought about 10% of what (GROSS OR NET).
Now, when I did get a full time job in 2009, it was tough for me to give 10% of what I was getting so I decided to take out all the necessary expenses such as living, eating and my student loans and all the other things which I thought were absolute necessity to survive. Then from the remaining portion I started to give off 10%. Meanwhile,I did speak to one of my friends about this and she also had a similar kind of approach on this issue. So I got this satisfaction what I was doing was acceptable. Until one day I spoke to one of my other colleagues and she told me according to her faith you should give 10% of your gross income. It didn't make much sense to me because gross is not what you get into your pocket. How can you even give 10% of what you are not getting. Well, I did lot of research on this topic and I found there were lot of supporters on both the side of the coin: giving 10% on gross and net income.
Now, my concern is that I am not sure what I promise at that time to God….I feel like I would have just thought that I will give 10% without thinking 10% of what. I am sure at that time for me 10% would be of what I get in my hand not my salary. Not giving much thought to taxes at that time.
So, if that is what I thought and that is what I agree to…I should be ok to give that much to charity. But the thing which bother me is that what if at that time I meant 10% of my gross(neglecting the taxes). Is God going to get unhappy from me.?
I feel like I am becoming so extreme about all these things. I have this fear what if I meant 10% of my gross (without considering that we don't get taxes money in our hand), God will do something wrong to me. But Isn't that we all are children of God and God will judge me by my intentions. He is the one who gives us everything. So how wont be that nitty and gritty about this thing. I just want to come in terms with myself that I am doing what I can within my capabilities. I am giving 10% of what I am getting which is what I must have thought at the first place. I am sorry God if I meant 10% of my gross. I feel like I need to stop myself from thinking to this extreme, otherwise I will go crazy. Whatever I am doing I should do it cheerfully because ultimately thats what he wants….to be happy about what you give. He is not going to punish me….he is like our parents. As our parents will not punish if we are not doing anything perfectly. They will be happy of the fact that at least we are trying best to our capabilities.