Jeevan lowered by going to a bar/party?

Vaheguroo Ji Ka Khalsa Vaheguroo Ji Ki Fateh!

This is my first post on this website and would just like to say in advance sorry if I cause any offence in any of the questions I ask, dass is just here to learn!

Is the Jeevan of a GurSikh lowered if they were to go to a party/bar etc?. The reason I ask is because I recently saw some photos of some GurSikhs that regularly do Seva, Keertan and Parchar around the country at a party. They were not dancing but there was still dancing and meat around them.

There was time period in this daas's lifetime, where interest in Sikhee and love for the guroo was strong, but I was bhola (innocent) and I attended such parties and events.

My approach was, "It's not like I'm indulging in the activities there, I'm simply present there, I won't be drinking or dancing"

Slowly, I learned that despite my actions, the fact that I am simply present at such a place was taking my mental state of mind down. Learned people have said, "Your company defines you"!

The parties and dancing events are also Sangat, they definitely arn't Sat-Sangat, but Sangat regardless, and ultimately, it comes down to the fact that, in this day and age, we arn't supreme chardee kala singhs, and such sangat is bound to steal our kamayee and take us down spiritually. It can also produce thoughts of kaam, krodh, lobh, moh, hankar and produce maya-like thoughts.

A time will come, when we will enjoy such events more than Akhand Keertan Akhaare. This mind is easily distracted by vices and what a better way to fight it, than avoid places, where these thoughts build up.

Hence, being front seat sevadaars, or being the rear seat sangat, I personally believe, that being present in such a place, is damaging to us spiritually, mentally, but also stains the name of Singh/Kaur. Tyar bar tyaar Veers/Bhens with Dastaar and their 5 kakkars, certainlly are meant to stand out, and such a party is the last place they would fit in.

Friends and family can be a cause of peer pressure and extremely hard to avoid at times, especially if we are young. But it's matter of standing up and simply saying NO with a stern position, yet at the same time, explaining and reasoning with love.

As far as your first post, there is no offense taken. This site is meant for learning and asking gurmat related questions.

Vaheguroojeekaakhalsaa
vaheguroojeekeefatheh!!!

ਜਿਥੇ ਗੁਰੂ ਬਿਸਰੇ ਉਥੇ ਨਾ ਜਾਵੈ
- Do not go that place where the Guru is forgotten.
Bhai Daya Singh Ji rehatnama


Obviously at work and school this requirement cannot be fulfilled. But I feel like in other instances we should make
efforts to honor GUru Sahibs bachan. At the same time how do we live like practical Gursikhs and should try tobring others into the fold of Sikhi . But we wont find suitable candidates for Sikhi in a bar or club most likely they will be in a Gurdwara Sahib.

Quote
Upkaar Singh
Hence, being front seat sevadaars, or being the rear seat sangat,

front seat sevadaar? rear seat sangat? care to explain such mythology?

ਮਾਝ ਮਹਲਾ ੩ ॥
Maajh, Third Mehla:

ਆਪੁ ਵੰਞਾਏ ਤਾ ਸਭ ਕਿਛੁ ਪਾਏ ॥
Those who lose their own selves obtain everything.

ਗੁਰ ਸਬਦੀ ਸਚੀ ਲਿਵ ਲਾਏ ॥
Through the Word of the Guru's Shabad, they enshrine Love for the True one.

ਸਚੁ ਵਣੰਜਹਿ ਸਚੁ ਸੰਘਰਹਿ ਸਚੁ ਵਾਪਾਰੁ ਕਰਾਵਣਿਆ ॥੧॥
They trade in Truth, they gather in Truth, and they deal only in Truth. ||1||

ਹਉ ਵਾਰੀ ਜੀਉ ਵਾਰੀ ਹਰਿ ਗੁਣ ਅਨਦਿਨੁ ਗਾਵਣਿਆ ॥
I am a sacrifice, my soul is a sacrifice, to those who sing the Glorious Praises of the Lord, night and day.

ਹਉ ਤੇਰਾ ਤੂੰ ਠਾਕੁਰੁ ਮੇਰਾ ਸਬਦਿ ਵਡਿਆਈ ਦੇਵਣਿਆ ॥੧॥ ਰਹਾਉ ॥
I am Yours, You are my Lord and Master. You bestow greatness through the Word of Your Shabad. ||1||Pause||

ਵੇਲਾ ਵਖਤ ਸਭਿ ਸੁਹਾਇਆ ॥
That time, that moment is totally beautiful,

ਜਿਤੁ ਸਚਾ ਮੇਰੇ ਮਨਿ ਭਾਇਆ ॥
when the True One becomes pleasing to my mind.

ਸਚੇ ਸੇਵਿਐ ਸਚੁ ਵਡਿਆਈ ਗੁਰ ਕਿਰਪਾ ਤੇ ਸਚੁ ਪਾਵਣਿਆ ॥੨॥
Serving the True One, true greatness is obtained. By Guru's Grace, the True One is obtained. ||2||

ਭਾਉ ਭੋਜਨੁ ਸਤਿਗੁਰਿ ਤੁਠੈ ਪਾਏ ॥
The food of spiritual love is obtained when the True Guru is pleased.

ਅਨ ਰਸੁ ਚੂਕੈ ਹਰਿ ਰਸੁ ਮੰਨਿ ਵਸਾਏ ॥
Other essences are forgotten, when the Lord's Essence comes to dwell in the mind.

ਸਚੁ ਸੰਤੋਖੁ ਸਹਜ ਸੁਖੁ ਬਾਣੀ ਪੂਰੇ ਗੁਰ ਤੇ ਪਾਵਣਿਆ ॥੩॥
Truth, contentment and intuitive peace and poise are obtained from the Bani, the Word of the Perfect Guru. ||3||

ਸਤਿਗੁਰੁ ਨ ਸੇਵਹਿ ਮੂਰਖ ਅੰਧ ਗਵਾਰਾ ॥
The blind and ignorant fools do not serve the True Guru;

ਫਿਰਿ ਓਇ ਕਿਥਹੁ ਪਾਇਨਿ ਮੋਖ ਦੁਆਰਾ ॥
how will they find the gate of salvation?

ਮਰਿ ਮਰਿ ਜੰਮਹਿ ਫਿਰਿ ਫਿਰਿ ਆਵਹਿ ਜਮ ਦਰਿ ਚੋਟਾ ਖਾਵਣਿਆ ॥੪॥
They die and die, over and over again, only to be reborn, over and over again. They are struck down at Death's Door. ||4||

ਸਬਦੈ ਸਾਦੁ ਜਾਣਹਿ ਤਾ ਆਪੁ ਪਛਾਣਹਿ ॥
Those who know the essence of the Shabad, understand their own selves.

ਨਿਰਮਲ ਬਾਣੀ ਸਬਦਿ ਵਖਾਣਹਿ ॥
Immaculate is the speech of those who chant the Word of the Shabad.

ਸਚੇ ਸੇਵਿ ਸਦਾ ਸੁਖੁ ਪਾਇਨਿ ਨਉ ਨਿਧਿ ਨਾਮੁ ਮੰਨਿ ਵਸਾਵਣਿਆ ॥੫॥
Serving the True One, they find a lasting peace; they enshrine the nine treasures of the Naam within their minds. ||5||

ਸੋ ਥਾਨੁ ਸੁਹਾਇਆ ਜੋ ਹਰਿ ਮਨਿ ਭਾਇਆ ॥
Beautiful is that place, which is pleasing to the Lord's Mind.

ਸਤਸੰਗਤਿ ਬਹਿ ਹਰਿ ਗੁਣ ਗਾਇਆ ॥
There, sitting in the Sat Sangat, the True Congregation, the Glorious Praises of the Lord are sung.

ਅਨਦਿਨੁ ਹਰਿ ਸਾਲਾਹਹਿ ਸਾਚਾ ਨਿਰਮਲ ਨਾਦੁ ਵਜਾਵਣਿਆ ॥੬॥
Night and day, the True One is praised; the Immaculate Sound-current of the Naad resounds there. ||6||

ਮਨਮੁਖ ਖੋਟੀ ਰਾਸਿ ਖੋਟਾ ਪਾਸਾਰਾ ॥
The wealth of the self-willed manmukhs is false, and false is their ostentatious display.

ਕੂੜੁ ਕਮਾਵਨਿ ਦੁਖੁ ਲਾਗੈ ਭਾਰਾ ॥
They practice falsehood, and suffer terrible pain.

ਭਰਮੇ ਭੂਲੇ ਫਿਰਨਿ ਦਿਨ ਰਾਤੀ ਮਰਿ ਜਨਮਹਿ ਜਨਮੁ ਗਵਾਵਣਿਆ ॥੭॥
Deluded by doubt, they wander day and night; through birth and death, they lose their lives. ||7||

ਸਚਾ ਸਾਹਿਬੁ ਮੈ ਅਤਿ ਪਿਆਰਾ ॥
My True Lord and Master is very dear to me.

ਪੂਰੇ ਗੁਰ ਕੈ ਸਬਦਿ ਅਧਾਰਾ ॥
The Shabad of the Perfect Guru is my Support.

ਨਾਨਕ ਨਾਮਿ ਮਿਲੈ ਵਡਿਆਈ ਦੁਖੁ ਸੁਖੁ ਸਮ ਕਰਿ ਜਾਨਣਿਆ ॥੮॥੧੦॥੧੧॥
O Nanak, one who obtains the Greatness of the Naam, looks upon pain and pleasure as one and the same. ||8||10||11||

Jaspreet Singh Jee.

I was just using fancy terms to get my point across.
I don't intend to classify front seat people as higher or rear seat people as lower.

My point was, the original post states, that the people, whose photographs they recently saw are in his words

"I recently saw some photos of some GurSikhs that regularly do Seva, Keertan and Parchar around the country at a party."

I was trying to say that regardless of whether you are a main sevadaar, keertanee, parcharak or anything as such (front seat)
Or whether you are not a main sevadaar, organizer, rather you are a Singh/Singhnee in Sangat Roop (rear seat)

You shouldn't be at such places at all. PERIOD.

Some people, feel that since they arn't sevadaars, keertanees or involved in a seva, they find it easier to step out to such places and events

Vaaheguroojeekaakhalsaa Vaaheguroojeekeefatehh...!!

Well all daas can say is that we should NOT judge anyone by just looking at some photographs because they can be misleading and they can be history too.

Daas used to go to parties before Guroosaab did his kirpa and gave daas the buddhi. So i guess its all about realization and HIS KIRPA and i dont think topics like these should even be discussed.

Vaaheguroojeekaakhalsaa Vaaheguroojeekeefatehh..!!

Quote
Upkaar Singh

Slowly, I learned that despite my actions, the fact that I am simply present at such a place was taking my mental state of mind down. Learned people have said, "Your company defines you"!

very well said.

Chota veer

The wise ones in both English and Panjabi say: "One can judge a man by the company he keeps" (Euripides, 480—406 a.d.) and also "jaisee sangat, taisee rangat" (Panjabi folk saying).

I would also like to second Daasandaas Veer Jee's comments, these might be old photos or whatever. We all make mistakes. So it's important to know the full story, and never to judge anyone anyway "dekh ke andiTh keeta", we should take and apply the above quoted proverb for ourselves only and not for others.

Please see this thread where we have discussed this topic before: [gurmatbibek.com]